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Blog Disclaimer: When I write I don't have an outline or such. I write off of the top of my head. I don't even bother to edit. If I were to edit I feel I would change the post entirely. I post what I feel at that given moment. It may even jump around a bit. Read at your own discretion. =)

Monday, August 9, 2010

Ten more days and I want pizza!

I have 10 more days to go before surgery.  I am starting to feel a bit more excited than I am scared.  I can finally see the result of the weight I have lost.  I have been searching through my clothes for what I will wear on the day of surgery to keep as a reminder of my pre-surgery weight.  I found a new blouse I purchased online and could never fit into.  That made me feel good.  All of my pants are stretchy.  I am not sure what I am going to do about bottoms to refer to.  I know I won't be going out and buying some new ones just to keep as a reminder of my before weight.  

It has now been 5.5 days since I started the pre-op diet.  I am not starving. I can pretty much eat as much as I want as long as I stay in the accepted food list. I am hungry, more than likely because I can't eat whatever I want. My biggest problem is I want just "one more" taste of homemade pizza.  Notice, I didn't say one more bite.  I want a taste, which in my old life it could mean a few slices to the whole pizza.  I have come a long way and am realizing more and more each day that I am ready to make a lifestyle change.  I was frustrated for a bit over the pre-op diet since I wasn't seeing the scale move. So, I didn't get on the scale today either.  It hasn't moved since last Friday. :( 

Pre-op diet isn't the easiest thing on earth.  I am very restricted and somethings I just don't like.  I know I have hit a plateau. The last time I plateaued it was on salad.  I think my body shut down.   A co-worker brought it to my attention that I might be "starving" so I ate that night and the next morning I lost 1 pound.  I am not eating the recommended 800 calories a day I am supposed to be eating.  I am probably averaging about 300 or so.  That isn't my intention.  I am already tired of the protein shakes.  I have a serious texture problem when it comes to certain foods.  I know... how in the heck did I get so big???  I can have sugar free foods like pudding and jello.  I will admit the puddings taste good I just can't handle the texture in my mouth for very long.  It gags me.  The jello is worse.  I have a funny story about the jello.  I have been telling my 2 year old I am dieting and I have diet food.  I tried to eat a sugar free jello yesterday and I made it about half way through the container.  I decided to give the rest to my girls.  When I gave my oldest a spoonful she looked at it funny and said "its not diet anymore"?  Poor girl, I am warping her mind.  I also have to be careful to not say I don't like it either because then all of a sudden she won't like it and they looovvvee jello. 

Needless to say, I will stay on the pre-op diet and continue on for 8 more days.  Day 9 is only clear liquids (no protein shakes either).  Day 10 is Surgery.

I still want pizza. :(

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