How could I?

Today is my Friday.  I didn't have an awful week just a normal week, but I am so tired. On my way to pick up the girls from daycare after work all I could think about was stopping at Redbox to get Tinkerbell for the girls to watch and having pizza for dinner.  Sounded like the perfect "Friday" night end of the work week type of thing to do until I realized I can't have pizza. 

How could this have happened? Today was the first day I haven't thought about my band and automatically reverted back to my old ways.  How could I have forgotten I have a band on my stomach? How could I have almost relapsed back to my old life prior to May 18th when I started my diet to lower my BMI? Back then pizza & movies went together and I would have had pizza every night if possible. How could I actually be disappointed I couldn't have pizza?  I just want to know how could I???

I can honestly say that the one and only time real food bothered me was a week post-op and I went in a restaurant out of town.  I have been able to be in restaurant and not feel I am suffering.  People can order anything they want and I can handle seeing them eat it.  I am ok with this. I have psychologically been okay with the "loss" of food in my life.  I made the decision to give up my old lifestyle. I have no regrets. I just don't know how I could have forgotten I have a band.  

Filling Up Woody

Filling up Woody the pinata for this year's company BBQ.

Good thing candy isn't my weakness.

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My port hurts. I'm tired. Am I eating too much?

My port has been hurting since Sunday.  It started all of a sudden.  More like an ache. Then a localized pain. Now it even feels swollen.  Before I could put my palm on my port & I would just feel the port. Now when I put my palm on my port it feels like my palm is "full" as if the port & muscle are pushing against my palm.  I am finding it hurts when I get up and can't straighten myself completey out and am walking kind of hunch backed.  It also hurts around the port a little tender around the area.  Should I be concerned?  Did any of you feel this?  Does it go away?

I have been extremely tired lately.  I have also been feeling a bit dizzy when walking. I can best describe it as a floating feeling.  I have had high blood pressure since I was 16 and weighed 141.  They call it the "silent killer" for a reason because you can't tell if its high or low. I am wondering if maybe my blood pressure medication is too strong since I have now lost 57 lbs.  I am seeing my primary care physician tomorrow.  I am hoping that is all it is and is that simple.  I would hate to have him say it may be because of my lap bad and I'm not eating enough. 

How much do all of you eat?  I can eat a cup of mushies and feel quite full. I checked in with my bariatric nurse and I felt chastised.  She told me "Eating more is not the goal, you should be eating no more than 4 ounces It doesn't matter what fits in the pouch, that is a stretchable moving stomach". That was in response to me saying "I am finding I can eat more and more often now.  It is much easier to eat too. 8 oz now fits. Is that normal? Or am I over doing it? I do measure." I still feel as if though I got a spanking. :(

I have lost 16 lbs since surgery on Aug 19th.  I have heard through the grapevine that if you have lost more than 10 lbs in 6 weeks post op you don't get a fill.  I am starting to feel like a failure. 

Please share your thoughts. 

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I Wish Wednesday

I wish my port wasn't hurting.  I feel like I am even walking hunched over a bit because it hurts to stand tall.

I wish for Isabella to continue to improve.

I wish for Baby Kelsee to be in the arms of her parents.

I wish for my oldest daughter's outpatient surgery next week to go well.  It should be fairly minor I am the one freaking out.  I may post details about it later. 

I wish for us to be able to make it to my youngest daughter's appointment after my other daughter's surgery.  Both appointments are out of town in Phoenix.  

I wish I wasn't becoming scale obsessed. I gained 6 oz this morning. :(

I wish life weren't so savory right now. :)

B.O.O.B.S. Questionaire

 I wasn't going to but I did!

BOOB's questionaire

Hi all the boobie girls! Someone much more organized than I am thought it would be fun to know more about you, and she enlisted me to think of some crazy questions…so…this is sort of a Gillyified version of Drazil’s BYOC. Knock yourselves out.

1) You’re trapped on a desert island and you can bring only 3 of your favorite foods along. What do you bring?

1.  My homemade pizza with thin crust, extra cheese & pepperoni, bacon, black olives 

2.  My homemade Chicken Folded Tacos with extra Cotija cheese

3.  Chips and Salsa extra chunky with very little onion

2) If you could meet any 3 people, living or dead, who would they be and why?

1.  Marilyn Monroe, need I say more?

2.  Miles Davis, I love his music Blues & Jazz are my fave. I even named my dog JAZZmyn

3.  Etta James, she sings "At Last" my most favorite song.  (I do believe in love just don't think it is for me)

I was going to say Jesus but he is already in my heart so I think I am good. 3) What is your stripper name? (take the name of your first pet and the name of the street you grew up on)

Sheila 13th or Sylvia 13th.  I don't remember which dog was first.  However they were both Irish Setters and I wish I could get one for my girls.  We could go with my alter ego too... Mistress Stiletto (borrowed from a friend ty-blondie).  I love the sound of it and wish I could be her.  :)

4) How old were you when you lost your virginity? Alternative question if you don’t want to answer this: What is your LEAST favourite part of your bod since losing weight? Your MOST favourite since losing weight?

I was 16 he was 23 and a Marine.  We were engaged.  I think my parents hated him.  

Least favorite is my side boobs and back fat/rolls

Favorite is my face because it is thinner.

5) Do you believe in ghosts or evil spirits? Would you be willing to spend a night alone in a house that is supposedly haunted? 

 

Yes I do believe in ghosts, spirits, orbs, etc.  NO, I will absolutely effing not sleep in a haunted house alone.   I will join all of you and hope I can run the fastest. 

6) What is your natural hair colour? If you dye it something completely different from what your momma gave ya, how come?  

 

Dark Brown.  It is all natural as of right now.  I have had dark blonde and red highlights put in and thinking of doing it again.  I posted a pic of it on Thousand Word Thursday.  I did leave out that in the top front I have a "bald" spot.  A very thin spot that has been there for years with no diagnosis as to why.  So that spot is definitely not from my weight loss.  

7) Boxers or briefs? Alternatively…bikinis or granny panties?

Guys, I love Boxer-briefs.  For me, I am a comfort kind of gal.  Hi-cut in cotton.  :) Once I get thin, that may change. 

8) If you could only watch one movie for the rest of your life, what would it be and why? (Trilogies do not count as one movie, cheaterpantses!)

 

Forrest Gump.  I love him!

9) What is your guilty pleasure (feel free to go straight to the gutter with this one if the spirit moves you!)

Time alone with peace and quiet because it is so rare.  Am I being a selfish mama to even admit that?

10) How many pounds gone forever are you celebrating??  

 

57 pounds... Hasta la Effin Vista Baby!!! 41 pre-op and my heaviest. 16 since banding Aug 19, 2010

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Motivation Monday & I have Protein Shakes

I do have protein shakes. I just hate them. :( In the photo is $100 worth of protein shakes. There is a guy here locally that sells them and he gave me about ten sample flavors. I thought they were the best tasting of all the proteins I tried. When I first tried them I thought they were great. Now to get them to my mouth is a battle. I have Strawberry-Kiwi, Cappuccino, and Perfect Chocolate. I love to mix the Cappuccino & Chocolate its almost like a Mocha Frapuccino. I dont drink coffee but I sure do love me a Mocha Frapuccino. :) I promise I will try a shake tomorrow morning. I have a little single cup blender and it makes them taste better when like a smoothie. However, I can't even tolerate them like that anymore :(

Needless to say, I think you all see what I am trying to motivate myself on... Protein Shakes.

Thank you all for caring. I really appreciate it.

Happy Monday All!

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48 Days No Protein

I wish that was my daugther's drawing. That is today's hair loss. :(

It has been almost 7 weeks since I had protein and I have another 2 to 3 weeks before I can have solids. I have had some mushie refried beans in the last 3 weeks. Some eggs over the weekend. Protein shakes... Hate them. Surgery on Aug 19th, two weeks pre-op. Two weeks post-op liquids and now almost 3 weeks on mushies. Sure, my body is looking better. Is the weight loss actually hair loss?

Yes, I cried when I saw that this morning only because each day has been like this for weeks now. Did any of you go through this? Does it end? Should I start looking at super short bald hairstyles?

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For Drazil & B.O.O.B.S.

Drazil, my phone won't let me post a comment to your post. :(  this is for you:  Someday I hope to be as grown up as you are and look my fears in the face. I aspire to have your strength & courage to overcome and win!  

For all you B.O.O.B.S., next year I am going to BOOBS and I am meeting all of you that have become my source of strength, encouragment, and inspirations.  I hope each of you attending this year have a wonderful time.  I am so jealous. 

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Head Hunger Made Me Over Eat

Ohhh emmmm geeeeee!

I was so hungry I ate an avocado as I was making mashed potatoes.  Somehow my head was telling me I am starving and scooped up the normal serving of mashed potatoes. I ate it all with cheddar cheese and sour cream. :( It was delicious. I felt myself get full and I needed to stop yet I kept on going.  Now all I can do is lay on the couch until this uncomfortable feeling passes. 
I wish I could say this is the last time.  Thank you band for letting me know you are there and working.  :)

Well, What's Your Answer? 9/18/10

1. What do you think other people think of you? Do you think they see you the way you really are?
     1a. Some think I am not smart.  Kinda dingy.  Full of love for my girls.  They also see me as a non domestic goddess. They see me as having everything under control.  Strong individual.
     1b.  No I don't. I am sorta smart.  (I am dingy at times). The love for my girls is obvious. However I do not have everything under control. I internalize too much. I lose sleep when stressing. I am not strong.  I am a chicken poop.  I am also normally a reactive person that has changed since I have had my girls. 

2. Have you thought about what you want your epitaph to read?
     Being a mother made her complete/happy.  Something along those lines.  Haven't given it any thought but being a mother is my greatest accomplishment. 

BYOC a day late.

1.  Last week we asked your favorite thing about being an adult. This week the question is:  I miss living with my parents, going to school, having a part time job where I spent on my money on toys like a kick ass stereo w/woofers in my car. 

2. When you make a serious life decision –do you use your head or your heart? I have to say my head. I tend to leave my heart out of everything.  However, when it came to my girls it was ALL HEART!

3. In relation to blogs….are you a never commenter, a sometimes commenter, an almost always commenter or a direct emailer kinda person?  I. Would have to say I am a sometimes commenter. I wish I could comment on all the blogs I follow.  When I am at work I "can't" comment. If I FEEL I NEED to comment I will pick up my cell phone and leave a comment. I do read every single blog I follow. Some touch me deeply & I will definitely leave a comment.

4. If life was a flavor –would it be savory, sweet or sour?   Hmmm, all of the above. Mostly sweet. There are some sour spots along with super savory spots.

5. Repeat question. Summarize your week in life or in blogland.  I am amazed at how everyone has struggles at all stages of banding. Some have read my mind and posted exactly what I was feeling & going through. 

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Thousand Word Thursday

One of my most favorite pieces of jewelry. My mom gave this to me on Mother's Day last year. My girls werent adopted yet, but we knew they were going to be mine. It was just a matter of time. The ring has each of their birthstones and their name engraved along the side of the birthstone.

One of my other most favorite pieces of jewelry is a necklace that says MOM that my sister gave me on the same day. If I find the necklace I will post a pic. Dont tell sister I dont know where it is.

I remembered I cried so much that day. It was the first time I realized my dream was coming true. The girls were never going to be anywhere else but with me. I was to be their Mother.

I have other pieces that are nice & sparkley that mean absolutely nothing to me. These two pieces will always be my favorite and a reminder of my very first Mother's Day. Thank you mom & sister!

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I Wish Wednesday

My Wishes for today.

-   I wish, hope, and pray that Baby Isabella starts to feel better soon.  She isn't doing as well as she was and it is such a sad situation.  I wish she would even have the strength to cry.  She has now stopped crying.  God, you can't have her.  Please, don't take her.  We want to keep her here with us!

-   I wish I wasn't on mushies.  I have to do 6 weeks post op.  Tomorrow is only week 4.  I'm afraid more and more chicken skin incidents are going to happen.  

-   I wish I wasn't a weak person. I wish I had guts and a strong back bone.  I wish I could have talked about what I wanted to talk about last night, but I wasn't ready.  Nothing is stewing they are just thoughts that need to be shared. 

-   I wish the perfect place to move to would magically appear and that I could afford it.  I know I will be moving and I want a 3 bedroom, 2 bath for the girls and I.  I have already promised my oldest a fish when we get our new home.  theShe also wants her "own special bathroom".  I think it will be easier if they have their bathroom and I have mine.

-   I wish I wouldn't have gambled in Vegas.  I did have a ton of fun.  Okay, I wish I would have kept all the winnings in my pocket. 

-   These are my standard wishes.  To raise my children to be happy and strong individuals.  Be a better parent.  To become a domestic goddess.  To continue to be as happy as I am.  :)

Have a happy Wednesday everyone!   

Better than sex! and did I just do that?

The answer is YES! I DID DO IT.

I am embarassed to even admit it. However this blog is about my life with the lap band and this is a doozy of an I did it! I ran to the hospital after work to see baby Isabella. We didn't get to go in right away they were working on changing her lines and they needed a sterile environment. Anyways, after the visit I am on my way to pick up my girls and my mind immediately turns to what am I going to feed them for dinner. Its already an hour later and they should be eating about that time. There is a Church's Chicken on the way there. I stop and order the 11 piece leg & thigh special. I am thinking I can feed my girls and give all the legs to my dad and he will be happy & fed too.

We stop at my parents house & visit for a few minutes. As my dad is taking the legs out I see a crunchy piece and decide to put it in my mouth and suck out all the flavor then spit it out.  I am still on mushies so I know I can't swallow it.  Oh my goodness was the flavor absolutely delicious.  I had no problem spitting it out after I was satisfied. Its only been 5 weeks since I had anything so tastey.   2 weeks pre-op liquid diet and now post-op diet has been pretty bland. The girls and I say good bye and head home. My oldest wants her chickens, (yes, plural) now!  I can't blame her. Its smells so good and it tasted delicious. 

We are now home and I have to debone the chicken so the girls can eat it. I take the skin off for them too.  Well without thinking a piece of fried chicken skin made it into my mouth. This time unconsciously. Next thing I know I swallowed some. OH MY GOODNESS WHAT DID I JUST DO?  I can't even finish that thought because all of a sudden there is a huge pain in my chest along the breast bone. I spit out what is left in my mouth and start praying. Oh my, I just know I am going to die. It really hurts.  I keep deboneing the chicken my girls need to eat dinner. I can die after dinner. I start to feel better and I am calmer now so I can think a bit more clearly.  

This is my clear thought:  "I survived that. Why don't I just suck all of the rest of the fat off of the chicken skin". YES, I DID!  I chewed up all of the chicken skin to make sure I got all of the flavor out then spit it out. Yup, I sure did.  I was possessed I am telling you.  I don't know who or what possessed me but something sure as heck did.  Fried chicken is not my weakness pizza and Mexican food are.  I might have eaten fried chicken max of 3 times a year on average over my lifetime. Honestly, not my thing. If you happen to come across whatever possessed me please, don't send it back. I hope it doesn't try and have a visit with you either. :)

Do I feel ashamed? Yes, I do.

Do I regret it? Now I do as I burp it up and feel totally uncomfortable.

What was I thinking while I was doing it??? This is better than sex! 

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Leaving Las Vegas

I hate leaving Vegas. I LOVE Las Vegas. 

I hate leaving my money there.

I hated saying goodbye to my friends. 

I hated that I couldn't eat the food since I am still on mushies.  I really didn't miss the food.  Just wanted to taste what everyone was talking about. 

I hate that I didn't get to party with Anissa.

I hate that we were only their for two nights.

However, I am going back in March. I can't wait! 

Las Vegas

Having a blast. I can't believe I haven't seen my friends in so long. DeDe looks the same. Denise looks younger. Anissa looks hot!

The pic is Anissa and I. I don't even look like me I can see the weight loss in my face. I forgot I had bones. Lol

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Thousand Word Thursday

ALWAYS KISS ME GOODNIGHT! I fell in love with this sign when I first moved into this apartment. It tells me the way life should be. Or, at least the way I think life should be. You should always kiss goodnight whether it be you husband, boyfriend, partner, or especially your children. Those lips you kiss could be your last. Go on, you know you want to kiss so just reach on over and give your special someone a smooch. Let them know with your lips what your heart says.

I also have one of these over the girls bedroom door not as a reminder but as an affirmation. Each night we give kisses, noseies, butterfly kisses, hugs, and ojitos which is Spanish for batting your eyes. In that order too. Sometimes I get extra kisses on each cheek. Sometimes I give them a gazillion kisses and my 2 year old will tell me "too much, mommy", then of course she gets a few more.

Since I used this sign for my Thousand Word Thusday I will admit that I am needy and NEED the reassurance that the kiss gives me. Whew! that was a bit hard to admit. :) My name is Angela and I am a kiss addict.

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I Wish Wednesday.

My first time participating in I wish Wednesday.

- I wish my dad wasn't in the emergency room right now.  Or, I wish my sister or I were with him.  I could take it further and wish my dad wasn't paralyzed from the waist down.  I wish he wouldn't have been an auto mechanic and that the jack didn't break and pin him under the motorhome and paralyze him at the age of 41.  My age to be exact.  I wish my mom and dad could have lived their years out traveling in a motorhome as they always dreamed.  On a bright side my dad has been paralyzed for 20 years and my mom found his first bed sore last week.  That says he has been taking good care of himself.  However, they are currently looking for a blood clot.  If the xrays come back negative they will do a cat scan.  There is a possibility this could be from the bed sore.  I love you dad!

- I wish Baby Isabella would have stayed in my niece's belly until her time "cooking" was done.  Bright side of that is Baby Isabella is doing as good as can be expected for a premie.

- I wish I didn't still feel guilty that Baby Kelsee is not with me or her biological sisters. 

- I wish my sister would consider renting a house with me instead of two separate homes.  We could each save some money and I would have my sister with me all the time.

- I wish I didn't have these crazy thoughts running through my head that have obsessed me for the last couple of days.  I am not ready to share yet.  I will when the time is right.  I have shared with "D" and either she is such a good friend she has my back and agrees or she is just telling me she does.  Either way, Thank you "D"!

- I wish for World Peace.  I really, really do!

- My greatest wish is to raise my children to be happy  and find the good in any circumstance. 


- I wish my daughters would learn that life is what they make it.  Life isn't what has been "dealt" to them and that they will rise above their obstacles.  

- I too wish I was a better mother.  When I was asked why I would be the best person to adopt my daughters this is what I said... "I am sure that someone else could provide for them better.  I am sure that someone else could parent better than I will.  However, NO ONE will love them the way that I do".  Sometimes I wish I didn't work ten hour days and could spend a few extra hours with them on a work night so I could just listen to them and hold them tight.  Sometimes I wish I could provide better for them and give them the house that they deserve instead of our tiny apartment.  Sometimes I wish I wouldn't yell at them since they are only 1 and almost 3.  Sometimes I wish I had more patience.  Sometimes I wish everyday was a good day.  Sometimes I wish Kaylee was an easy baby like her sister Leeah was. Sometimes I wish I could sleep a whole night without one of the girls waking up in the middle of the night.  Sometimes I wish there were just more hours a day so I could get my "fill" of them before going to bed.  Sometimes I wish they would never grow up.  I love my girls!!!

- I wish I was a Domestic Goddess.  I wish I wasn't a slob and hated laundry.  I wish I liked to clean.  I wish I was disciplined enough to realize that I HAVE TO DO LAUNDRY IN A TIMELY MANNER!!! I wish I liked to fold and put away laundry if it were clean. I wish I ran the vacuum more.  I wish the cat didn't use a litter box.  I wish I was more organized at home.  Heck, I even wish my van was clean on the inside. 

- I wish I had the chance to find out if money would really make me happier.  lol

- I also wish to continue to be as happy in the future as I have been in the last year.  Life is good and God is GREAT!!!

I think that may be all of the wishing that is going through my head at the moment.  Hopefully you won't be seeing the same wishing next Wednesday. 

Happy wishing everyone!

Real Shopping

I went shopping yesterday and actually made a purchase instead of trying things on like last time.  My sizing is all over the place.  Obviously because sizes vary, but also because I don't know what size I am.  Ron "insisted" I try things on that I swore wouldn't fit.  They actually did fit.  Even though they don't fit perfect right now they will eventually fit.  He says I need to think of the future not just today.  One of the tops I bought was a tank top in a 2X... I am still stunned.  Even a dress that said it was an 18 (which I highly doubt it since it fit).  I am shocked that I am thinner.  Did any of you feel this way when you first noticed that you were getting smaller?  I know most of it is pre-surgery weight loss, but I am still amazed that I have shrunk and am continuing to shrink.  I know have a few bits of clothes that actually fit and I feel comfy in.  Hopefully that is enough to hold me over for a few months or so. 

The big shocker of the day was when I tried on a mini skirt in a 24 and it fit!  Yes, I did buy it.  The second I walked out of the fitting room the sales lady said that I looked good.  I even tried on some jeans this time since I could move easier this go around.  they were from Lane Bryant and they were their Fit Right (???) brand and they were a 22 and I thought they should have been tighter.  I am an apple shape and I felt they were too loose around the butt and thigh area.  I am stunned that those numbers would even go over my feet and ankles let alone my body.  

A better me is coming out one pound at a time. 

Have a great day all!

That wasnt so easy

Ron and I went for our first walk today. It wasnt easy. :( We went to walk at a local park that has a 1 mile track with inclines. Thank goodness Ron offered to push the stroller on the "ups" I'm not so sure I would have made it. We completed 1 lap and I said I couldn't do another before we were even to where we started. Luckily I have a very understanding boyfriend that knows its going to take some time to get me into shape.

I remember when I would do 2 to 3 laps as a warm up before heading to Curves. I "think" we kept a good pace, but I couldnt tell you for sure. Can I blame it on pushing about 60 pounds of children in the double stroller??? I normally would have taken the one lap as a defeat since I couldn't continue. However, now I see it as a beginning. Tomorrow we will do it again. Working towards a better me even if it is only 1 mile at a time :)

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test - trying out a blog app

hoping this will work

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BYOC

For anyone new, BYOC stands for Bring Your Own Craziness and it's 5 questions every Friday where we get to know each other better.

Copy to your blog and answer if you want to….and have fun!!

1. In the spirit of back to school time -what is your favorite school supply?   

     Colored pens and fine point colored Sharpies

2. Assume your house is on fire and the whole thing is going to burn to the ground and your loved ones are out and safe….and you have a few minutes to grab 5 things. Just five. What would they be?

     1.  My dog Karma
     2.  My daughter's cat Boomer
     3.  All of the important documents about our lives.  Birth Certificates.  Social Security cards. Immunization records, etc
     4.  Clothes for all of us
     5.  Purse for everything that I keep in it.

3. In the spirit of my new found love on vacation –what is your favorite drink –alcoholic or not? 

     Alcoholic drink is a Bud Light Chelada (I sure do miss those).
     Non alcoholic is water. 

4. When is your birthday (if you want to say, no year needed) and what is your Zodiac sign. Does your sign match your personality?

     January 29th. I am an Aquarius.  Ummm yes, that is me.

     Aquarius Likes : fame and recognition, personal privacy, rainbows, dreams, magic, change for its own sake, eccentricity, surprises, and living within their means despite the many temptations which constantly surround them every waking moment.

     Aquarius Dislikes : emotion and intimacy, people who show off, being taken for granted, being pinned down, violence and fighting, and senseless or purposeless extravagance of any sort.

5. A little spin on my repeat question. I usually ask which blog or comment stuck with you and why? You can answer that as usual or how about just giving a summary of your week or how you feel about blogland this past week or anything you noticed…does that make sense?

     I love that I am enjoying this more and more. I look forward to seeing what is going on in everyone's lives and hearing about all of the success in life.  Amey in Idaho is going to be sending me some clothes. Love you Amey!  A bit jealous about everyone going to BOOBS in Chicago. Count me in next year!   Thank you to all have have commented on my blogs. I really appreciate it.  B

What a special day today is.

I had a great day today.

My neice gave birth to her daughter today.  She had her at 30 weeks instead of the normal 40.  Her mother, my sister had her son 2 months early. I guess its in the blood.  My neice started bleeding Tuesday morning and went to the hospital. They found out she had lost her mucus plug. Later that night her water broke.  Theyb gave them steroids and it was critical the baby stay in the womb for 24 hours. She made it almost 60 hours. Baby girl came into the world at 3lbs 3oz. She is breathing on her own. Such a blessing!  God is good. :)

My neice told me she is going to teach how to say "ooooldddd" when she asks the baby how old her grandma is.  I started that with my oldest. No reason to change the tradition.  Of course my sister is my baby sister.  My only sister.  Therefore my favorite sister in the whole wide world!!!

Thousand Word Thursday

Amy over at Babbles of a Bandster has a new Thursday idea for us...

Here it is in her words:

I'll post a subject on Wednesday, of which you should post a photo that relates on Thursday. Label your post "Thousand Word Thursday" or something to that effect. The photo can be new, old, or somewhere in between. And of course, you are welcome to use actual words to describe your photo! It's that simple!

Without further adieu, our first Thousand Word Thursday subject is:

Let's celebrate our own beauty and how wonderful we all look with a photo of your favorite feature (on your own body and not X-rated, please, Draz!)

i

I like my hair.  I like that in the last year it has grown out since I cut it shoulder length.  I like my layers too.  I like my hair because I am 41 and don't have much gray.  I also like the fact that I don't have all over hair color and it is healthy.  That color is 100% natural.  Not for long though the gray is starting to show up more and more.  Hmm, I wonder if I should stop pulling them out.  I like my hair when it is straight with it natural wave or when I put hot rollers in it.  I just like it! :)

First day back to work.

Today is day 14 post-op and it was my first day back to work.  I can't believe how tired I felt, not sleepy I just felt like I was dragging. I think its because I didn't have enough calories let alone any protein.  the soup I took for lunch was a bit too chunky and I didn't have my strainer. I also wore some pants today to work that are all stretch and comfy but after wearing them for so long I started to feel as if though I was wearing a binder or something. It was really tight and uncomfortable for a ten hour work day.  Now I know why they said loose clothing after surgery.

As each day goes by I notice improvement in how I feel. I still find it hard to bend over and pick something up off of the floor. My friend had a spur of the moment birthday party for her son and we left early because I was exhausted from leaning over trying to grab my 19 months old hand to keep her out of trouble.  Is it normal to hurt when I bend?  Bend sideways? 

On a bright side, Ron stopped by this evening so we could see each other.  We didn't spend much time together since I am so tired but I love the fact that he is willing to come over if even for just a hug & kiss.  I told him I felt pretty lucky to have him in my life and he said he felt lucky also.  I don't want to jinx us, but I am very happy with how we are