Blog Disclaimer

Blog Disclaimer: When I write I don't have an outline or such. I write off of the top of my head. I don't even bother to edit. If I were to edit I feel I would change the post entirely. I post what I feel at that given moment. It may even jump around a bit. Read at your own discretion. =)

Thursday, July 29, 2010

21 days til surgery.

As of today I only have 21 days until my surgery.  I never thought I would even make it this far.  I decided to write this blog after reading other blogs.  I am writing mostly for myself and for my daughters.  I am going to try to make this as short as I can as to how I came to be here with 21 days before me until my new life begins. 

I originally wanted to have bypass surgery done for my vanity.  I also felt that I had to be thin in order to find love. I have met someone that I call "Babe" and I met him at my heaviest weight in my entire life.  He is a wonderful man and supportive of me and my decision.  I originally checked into bypass in 2002 when I lived in California.  It was actually submitted to my insurance for approval.  Then I got laid off from my job and moved back to Arizona to mom and dad. Into their home and stayed there.  I loved living with them. I was an adult "mooch".  I lived a very selfish life and everything revolved around me,  or so I thought. 

Well, in July of 2008 I got custody of my oldest daughter "L", she was 9 months old.  I knew bypass was not going to be for me because of how invasive it is.  I decided on Lap Band.  In January of 2009 I had finally saved up the money I would need in order to go forward with Lap Band.  To my surprise, my 2nd daughter came to me on February 17, 2009, she was just 3 weeks old.  "K" came to me on my grandmothers birthday.  I know it was her way of telling me I was doing the "right" thing.  In my heart I already knew I wouldn't let her go. In order to get "K" I had to move out of my parents house.  I had a new home within 20 minutes.  Thank you Kim... I moved into my friends home with both girls that night.

Needless to say life came in the way of my plans.  As John Lennon said:  "Life is what happens when you make other plans".  In April of 2009 I was asked by CPS to move out of my friends home and get my own place.  I was told that it would help with the adoption and look better for me that I could provide for my girls unassisted.  So, all the money I had saved up went towards an apartment for "L", "K", and I.  I had to buy everything for a 2  bedroom apartment.  We basically only had our clothes and beds. After moving into our own place my only concern was taking care of my family and making sure I had everything that CPS would ever think of in order to prove that I was "fit" to adopt my girls.  Keep in mind that this was going to be a "single parent" adoption.  I had to prove my worth as a mother and father.  I am proud to say that in November of 2009 I became a mother two of the most beautiful Angels that God could have given me.  I love you "L" & "K". 

I now had the motivation that made all the difference in the world... I had two children to raise and I wanted to see them grow up.  I now knew it was time to make changes in my life.  Since I was going to have the surgery done in 2009, I had already done everything my insurance required.  In December 2009, my insurance at work changed.  We now had a $2500 deductible... yikes.  The good part was once you reached that everything was covered at 100%.  I had an emergency room visit in late 2009 (luckily we had 4th quarter deductible carry over). Then in Jan 2010 I had to have an MRI.  Voila! Deductible met.  I knew I had a $1000.00 access fee for bariatric surgery.  I was ready.

I went to the seminar in Jan 2010, turned in my paperwork and somehow it got a bit "lost".  Once it was found we needed to get the info from my family Dr again.  He was on vacation for a month.  May 18th 2010, I have my first visit with the surgeon for Lap Band.  YAY!!! So I thought.. WRONG.  My BMI is too high.  I need to lose 28 lbs before they will even submit it to the insurance.  She asks me how long it will take me, I tell her 4 weeks.  She says great, I will see you in 3 weeks.  Needless to say, my 3rd visit was July 20, 2010.  It took me 8 weeks to lose 28 lbs.  I was prepared for the failure of not making my weight.  I was so close that morning I wasn't sure if I would make it.  Dr comes in and says surgery is Aug 19th pending insurance authorization.  I will see you in 2 weeks  for a weight check and then you can start the pre-op diet.  I am on my way.  I see the Dr again on August 3rd.

Here I am today, looking at the longest 21 days of my life.  All the while I am wondering if my insurance is going to approve my surgery.  I completed the 6 month Dr supervised diet in July 2008.  That is within the 2 year guideline, however I am a bit concerned.

I have my fingers crossed.  Until next time.Have a great day!

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